Justin Continues to Teach Me After He is Gone

"A new broom sweeps clean. 

Where there's a will there's a way."

An email to a friend on my birthday... 

WoW!  I did not realize you lived in Philly! I lived in Chalfont from 2002 through 2006...Justin graduated from Central Bucks South high school...the first year we lived there it snowed 27" in 7 hours if I could have gotten to a truck rental business I would have MOVED!! hahaha lord it got cold there...my poor Chihuahua was so cold sometimes! haha but if I had tried to put one of those coats on him he'd have eaten me!! lolololol

Thank you for thinking of me on my birthday...I have cried most of the day away...Justin was so much of my life...I truly wanted grandchildren and Justin would have been an amazingly great father and loving husband. In middle school he had already picked names for his children!! My 'planner'!

I was looking for a specific birthday card today that he had given me when I opened an envelop with another birthday card and a book marker fell out...for some unknown reason I turned it over and on the back Justin had written "A new broom sweeps clean. Where there's a will there's a way." The writing looked to be when he was in middle school...I burst into tears...wishing he were here so I could call him and ask the circumstances of the quote...why he had written it the way he did...you know Maria momma heart queries... "where there's a will" was written in a semi circle [?]

I believe [in my heart] Justin wished for me to find this today...I was actually out among people this past holiday...for the first three years I slept from October through February. Truly, I seemed to be like a bear hibernating.  Even the little greeting lady at Walmart was proud of me this year for being out and about...

Through this year if I were sitting at a traffic light I would motion the driver beside me to roll down their window...then I'd shout Merry Christmas and they would burst into laughter and shout Merry Christmas back! I must have told 500 people Merry Christmas...I guess I was making up for hibernating the past three years!



 
I believe I got so wrapped up in being 'Justin's momma' I forgot who [Karen] is...now I must go and find out who she is and what she can do without Justin by her side. "A new broom sweeps clean. Where there's a will there's a way."  

Damn Maria I cannot tell you how many times I have been knocked down in life; I have just never been down this long I always got right back up!!!! I have been in counseling since 3/2011...that's a long time...I should be cured of anything and everything by now! 



Before [before everything was different] when I was knocked down it never involved anything I cherished, wanted, needed, cared for, loved, and was so closely tied to..... this truly sucks!   

Sorry it's been a bad day...another birthday without Justin...this makes five...but now that I have received direction things may just begin to look up...I know that I need to find me...Justin's momma died.  She died with Justin at 12:30 P.M. on January 11, 2011.

I hope this message isn't to, you know, weird? Your message just happened along when I realized what the problem/solution is....

Try to stay warm up there in Philly...I did like it there...although the people are always in such a hurry! Justin once asked me, "momma why are they always in such a hurry?" My reply, "I don't know honey I've never been in one!" hahaha I truly loved being a momma...now I have to be a 'Karen'...oh lord that's a little scary!!

Take it easy Chick! I'll try not to get too much weird~er

Hum? Karen? WoW!

The Aquarius Mom

"Eclectic hardly begins to describe you. “You’re affectionate yet aloof, stern yet spontaneous, the world’s mellowest control freak,” write the AstroTwins. Organized chaos is your specialty, meaning that your family life never becomes boring. You might be surprised by the depth of emotion motherhood has brought to your normally intimacy-fearing self—and you have your fourth house of motherhood, governed by traditional Taurus, to thank for that. Be careful not to lose site of your true edgy self or you may build up resentment or trigger an identity crisis."

"Organized chaos" describes me to a 'T'!! I lost sight of myself because of loving you so much honey; this is quite alright, I do not mind in the least. Justin DeSha-Overcash you were so loving back you found the 'key to my heart'!

I found it interesting that my fourth house of [Motherhood] is governed by traditional Taurus ~ and you Babe are a Taurus! Gosh knows I wish you were hear so I could pick up the damn phone and call you!

Nope there was [never] a dull moment in our house was there honey? Justin you brought out in me a depth of emotion I never knew I had or could experience. Thank you honey so very much for I never knew true love until you came into my life. Justin I have no regrets we had so much fun and laughed a lot. I just wish this had not come to an end.

Oh and not to worry Justin, for you know me well, there was never a moment of resentment or identity crisis, on my part, before or after I saw that tiny beautiful face in the delivery room May 1, 1988 at 2:41 AM. Only joy and happiness can, and will continue, to be found in my shattered heart for you honey.

I am lucky I guess for you'd have to say I have so many memories to play over and over in my mind of the laughter filled moments which no one can take away from me, Honey I love and miss you something awful, momma

Justin Christmas 2009 we had a great day!  Laughter, conversation, an epic silly string battle, great food, special sweets and treats....son I miss you so very much I do not even bake Red Velvet cake anymore...your favorite.  I wish we could go back in time, just one minute before you were shot, and somehow your fate could be changed.  I would gladly take your place Justin my son, my constant, my beloved, my joy, my heartbeat, mt breath, my everything.

WHO Murdered Christopher Cummings?

Christopher was studying law enforcement at Old Dominion University and instead of going home for summer break was talking a course!

Christopher Cummings just 20 years old was senselessly murdered in his frat house, June 10, 2011, when an unknown assailant kicked open the door at 4:30 AM.and shot him to death.

Chris' birthday is approaching on January 29, 2015 a day hardest on parents, siblings, and friends. 

The SENSELESS MURDERS of our young people MUST STOP!  They have never captured Chris' murderer [?]  Someone knows something human nature alone dictates someone will talk; how can a person live with this tragic and horrid murder of an innocent person on their soul?

Christopher Cummings and those victims like him MUST HAVE THEIR DAY IN COURT!  They must have JUSTICE!

I am Justin's [sad] momma

There is a reward for information leading to the arrest and incarceration of the person [or persons] responsible for the murder Chris and assault and attempted murder of his Frat mate on June 10, 2011.


Christopher Cumming's Memorial Video 

http://youtu.be/vd-8PPaYUUM

Friend writes rap video in Christoper Cummings honor
 
http://youtu.be/GTs1rEJik_8

Depression and Mothers of Murdered Children

I did not know how badly "The Date" was going to hit me this year.  'It' has hit me as badly as the day the sheriffs knocked on my door to deliver the tragically debilitating news of Justin's murder January 11, 2011 at 4:27 PM.

Depression is an uncontrollable emotion.  I know because I never experienced [depression] before Justin was murdered.  I see a psychologist once a week and there is a shelf in one of my kitchen cabinets that looks like a freaking pharmacy; yet still I have no relief from Justin being gone from my life.

I truly do not believe I will have relief until I see Justin's smile and his hand reaches for mine in the light.  This is when I honestly believe I will have relief again.

Suddenly in the midst of whatever I am doing I simply [must] sleep.  These sleep episodes are uncontrollable, too.  I sleep for hours on end if I wake it may be to feed my animals or let Luke out and I am literally back asleep before my head hits the pillow.  These are [hard] sleeps; if I dream I remember nothing, I do not hear the phone ringing, or hear if people knock, I am literally out. 

This is what I have been doing since the 11th.  I am typing this while I am awake because I do not know if I will experience another sleep episode.  Right now I feel fine but this is how I have felt everyday then suddenly I cannot stay awake. This has happened everyday since the 12th; I have slept approximately 16 or more hours everyday.

I was accustomed to these sleep episodes for the first couple years.  Then they became less and less.  However, since Sunday they have come back with a fury.

I really [really] miss Justin and my life sucks without him here.  I wish I could say something positive or share a moment of joy but without Justin there just is not the same hope or future.  Hell there is not any future.  The murderer took this all away with two bullets.

All I want is my son back, I want life the way it was one minute before the MURDER of JUSTIN HAPPENED! 

Justin's [forlorn] momma

Christmas 2009 Justin and me having our epic Silly String battle!  We always had so much fun from the time Justin was six months old until he was [murdered] we laughed about everything..now nothing is funny!

!

WHY AMERICANS CANNOT FIND EMPLOYMENT

SLAVE LABOR IN PRISON BY TOP CORPORATIONS SOME PAY AS LITTLE AS 17 cents an HOUR! WE THE PEOPLE HAVE BEEN ROYALLY SCREWED BY MONEY, GREED, AND A CAPTIVE WORKFORCE OF MODERN SLAVES!  These inmates cannot call in sick, do not get vacations, they are there ready to work every day!

Who is investing? At least 37 states have legalized the contracting of prison labor by private corporations that mount their operations inside state prisons.

The list of corporations using inmate slave labor will "BLOW YOUR MIND"

The list of such companies contains the cream of U.S. corporate society:
IBM, Boeing
Motorola
Microsoft 
AT&T 
Wireless 
Texas Instrument 
Dell, Compaq 
Honeywell 
Hewlett-Packard 
Nortel 
Lucent Technologies 
3Com Intel 
Northern Telecom 
TWA 
Nordstrom’s
Revlon 
Macy’s 
Pierre Cardin 
Target Stores
and many more. 

All of these businesses are excited about the economic boom generation by prison labor. Just between 1980 and 1994, profits went up from $392 million to $1.31 billion. 

Inmates in state penitentiaries generally receive the minimum wage for their work, but not all; in Colorado, they get about $2 per hour, well under the minimum. And in privately-run prisons, they receive as little as 17 cents per hour for a maximum of six hours a day, the equivalent of $20 per month. 

The highest-paying private prison is CCA in Tennessee, where prisoners receive 50 cents per hour for what they call “highly skilled positions.” At those rates, it is no surprise that inmates find the pay in federal prisons to be very generous. There, they can earn $1.25 an hour and work eight hours a day, and sometimes overtime. They can send home $200-$300 per month.

Thanks to prison labor, the United States is once again an attractive location for investment in work that was designed for Third World labor markets. A company that operated a maquiladora (assembly plant in Mexico near the border) closed down its operations there and relocated to San Quentin State Prison in California. In Texas, a factory fired its 150 workers and contracted the services of prisoner-workers from the private Lockhart Texas prison, where circuit boards are assembled for companies like IBM and Compaq.

[Former] Oregon State Representative Kevin Mannix recently urged Nike to cut its production in Indonesia and bring it to his state, telling the shoe manufacturer that “there won’t be any transportation costs; we’re offering you competitive prison labor (here).”

NOW if this article does not make you, as an American Citizen, fighting mad I do not know what will! 

To be quite honest when I read the contents of this article it made me sick!  I knew that Corporate America would 'stoop low' to 'beef up' their profit margins; however, I had no idea they would stoop this low.  Now I understand how the upper echelon can afford to receive such outlandish bonuses.  They are receiving they monies [off the backs of the new 21st Century SLAVE LABORERS].  While We The People are starving and cannot find EMPLOYMENT!

WE THE PEOPLE must "Stand UP and Say SOMETHING!"

I am Justin's [I am an American and I am tired of getting SCREWED] momma

Murderer LOST Appeal ~ YES!

******** APPEALS COURT UPDATE APPEAL WON THIS TIME********

October 1, 2014

The opinion came back on Friday and I haven’t read it yet, but we won by a close margin. That means the Court upheld the conviction . 

The brief is 45 pages long and I have been in Court so I will scan and email it to you on Tuesday. The case is also reported, which means it can be used and quoted in other cases. There is the possibility the Defense Attorney may appeal this case to the Court of Appeals and the Attorney General thought that might be a possibility.

Take care. This is GOOD NEWS!!

********A WIN FOR JUSTIN!!! Justice PREVAILED!!!********

Let's pray Mr. Williams cannot get another appeal or if he does he LOOSES AGAIN!

Opinion link on google:

http://www.mdcourts.gov/opinions/cosa/2014/0651s12.pdf 

Mr. Williams LOST Appeal can be read on this link from google.  The sad issue [which drives me up a tree as Justin's momma] is the description of what occurred the day Mr. Williams cold bloodily murdered my son is a LIE!  A COMPLETE AND UTTER LIE!  There was no struggle between Justin and Mr. Williams for the gun; my son, Justin, had never seen a firearm in his entire life.  He was a[geekl] a double major Physics and Astronomy/minor Geophysics who did not know the first thing about fighting!   

I spoke to the eyewitnesses once we knew there would not be a jury trial; I know exactly how my beautiful son died~cruelly, horrifically, senselessly, at pointblank range with Williams looking him in the eyes!?!

Mr. Williams defense attorney guided Mr. Williams into taking a [plea deal] for he knew a jury trial would bring in experts and the coroners report which would prove [and logically dispute] everything this murdering sociopath uttered.

God please watch over Justin's path of justice. In Jesus name we pray, amen.

Justin's [for the first time in four years H-A-P-P-Y] momma

Justin and me standing outside of the rental home where Williams would enter uninvited and fatally shot my wonderful son on January 11, 2011.  Why didn't Williams ask Justin for my address before shooting Justin so he could kill me also?  I died that day anyway!  I breathe and my heartbeats but this is all.  WILLIAMS; I WANT MY SON BACK!

A Day in Prison For a MURDERER

****** SPECIAL ALERT ******

EVERYONE YOU WILL BE HAPPY TO KNOW I JUST SPOKE WITH A CASE MANAGER AND MR. WILLIAMS [THE SPAWN OF SATAN] SPENDS TWENTY THREE [23] HOURS A DAY IN HIS CELL! YES IT APPEARS THIS MONSTER CANNOT GET ALONG WITH THE OTHER INMATES; IMAGINE THAT!

I WAS SO UPSET AT THE SENTENCING HEARING WHEN JUDGE SURETTE SENTENCED THIS CRAZED REMORSELESS MURDERER TO FORTY NINE [49] YEARS. I KNEW THEN [IF] HE WERE EVER RELEASED HE WOULD KILL AGAIN. 

Even though she added for the record, "Mr. Williams I have been on the bench for thirty years and I can tell you now YOU cannot be rehabilitated!  YOU chose a lesser Victim and Mr. Williams YOU could have turned and walked away.  But You chose not to."

IF NOTHING ELSE HE WILL MORE THAN LIKELY SPEND HIS ENTIRE LIFE BEHIND BARS FOR MURDERING ANOTHER INMATE!

THERE IS SOMETHING SERIOUSLY WRONG WITH THIS HUMAN BEING AND I AM SO SORRY MY BEAUTIFUL JUSTIN HAD TO ENCOUNTER THIS MONSTERS EVIL PRESENCE IN THE LAST FEW MOMENTS OF WHAT WOULD BE THE END OF HIS BEAUTIFUL LIFE.

OH HONEY IF ONLY I HAD BEEN THERE FOR YOU. REST EASY NOW BABE THIS MONSTER WILL ENSURE HIS OWN JUSTICE AS HE DOES NOT KNOW ANYTHING BUT EVIL, HATRED, AND ANGER.

I ASKED HIM TO SEEK THE LORD OBVIOUSLY HE CHOSE NOT TO LISTEN.

FIRST DEGREE MURDERER~Deandre R. Williams, 27 years old, can attempt to plead for parole in 2038!  If he receives parole in MD he will be transported to a prison in Washington, DC for the Felony II handgun Charge [December 18, 2010] for which he was wearing an ankle monitor when he MURDERED JUSTIN on January 11, 2011.

He cold bloodily murdered my Justin; as Justin protected two fellow UMd alumni/friends.

Christmas morning 1993 Charlotte, NC my Justin, my only child, was 4 years old.  I remember this morning as if it were yesterday Baby!

 

 

 

Fall 2005 Senior Mom's Night...again I remember this night like it were yesterday Honey!  I love this pose we came up with and some of the other guys wanted to do the same pose [remember]?  Of course you do Babe!

 HE HAD NO RIGHT TO TAKE YOU, YOUR FUTURE CHILDREN AND MY FUTURE GRANDCHILDREN AWAY FROM US!  HE HAS THE BLOOD OF MANY GENERATIONS OF OUR FAMILY UPON HIS SOUL!

I desperately want you back son but know this is improbable!

 I LOVE YOU JUSTIN FROM THE MOMENT I SAW YOU I COULD NOT HELP BUT ADORE YOU.  We will meet again honey I know this to be fact. Love and miss you Babe times infinity plus one, momma